On Rape…

A Black woman asked me: “What is rape?”
(She also said some other stuff about “regret sex,” false accusations, and other shit.)

My response was harsh, but I don’t regret a word I said:

Having sex with someone who hasn’t consented, who is unable to consent,
or who cannot legally consent is rape. It’s not that complex.

The weight and obligation of securing consent can be burdensome, but who gives a fuck, do it anyway!

Secure consent!; the less you know someone, the more precautions you
have to take to secure, or even prove consent. So just fucking do that

How about not having sex with people who have potential to
“regret” their decision, or who have the slightest potiential to
interpret your actions as force, or against their will/consent.

How about only fucking when you have a bond, connection, a level of
trust, and rapport with (your partner/s)? I ain’t talking no “wait until
marriage” shit, I’m just saying know who you fucking and know who fucks
you, at the very fucking least. How fucking hard is that?

As a
Black man I take the position that Black women are worth the fucking
effort, the safety and security of women is worth the extra fucking
effort! Damn.

That “in the moment” shit don’t fly nowadays, it should have never flew in the past.

You don’t have the right to have sex with another person, even if
you’ve has sex with them before, just hours before, even if you been
married to them for decades.

I know the history of false
accusations against Black men for rape, but I also think we too often
forget the history of actual rape Black women have endured since
reaching these shores. In fact, the rape of Black women has occurred way
more often than the false accusation of rape against Black men! So
please don’t ever pretend that your defense of Black rapist is rooted in
historical injustice (esp. since that defense is usually reserved for
famous, wealthy, or prominent Black men.)

We as African men and
women owe it to each other to respect and be as humane as possible to
each other! To treat each other with the utmost respect, love, and

This shouldn’t be an issue of debate! We should
be arguing remedies, solutions, and healing at this point; not fucking
debating “what is rape,” WTF!?!? That’s unacceptable!

We need to
stop fucking compounding the oppression we all suffer under by playing
around with such issues, or creating arguments where there should be

Opposed Rape, with all that we are! It’s that’s simple.

(I wasn’t really mad at the Sister, but the issue overall, maybe I should apologize for all the cussin.)