Yes you can be a Pan-Africanist or “pro-Black” and have a non-African/Black as a significant other. I don’t know about the pro-Black “when it comes to choosing a wife or a boyfriend,” I’ve never had a non-Black wife or boyfriend.” LOL! (I’m know I’m going to regret making that little joke.)
I know it really pisses people off when I say this, but I’m just submitting to the historical evidence. Who we marry, love, or have sex with is not always the best yardstick to measure our ideology or loyalties.
A Misogynist can be married to a woman, a White Racist can be married to a Black person, A pro-Black Black person can be married to a non-Black, and a self-hating Uncle Tom can be married to a Black women, even a dark skinned Black woman. Hell an Atheist can be married to a Christian. A Muslim can marry an Infidel. It happens.
Biology and ideology are not the same thing and they don’t always line up, nor do they cancel each other out, the way we would expect them to.
People are Primates, and we have been fucking and partnering across racial, ethnic, tribal, ideological, cultural, and national boundaries since we first created racial, ethnic, tribal, ideological, cultural, and national boundaries.
But fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it; who we fuck almost never has any impact on our deeply held ideas, values, ideologies, or prejudices. Remember the KKK member that killed those Jewish people in Kansas, who was found to favor having sex with Black Trans prostitutes? Having sex with Black Trans people didn’t abate his hate for Blacks, Natives, Jews, or anyone else.
I’m no expert in human sexuality but I know how it has played out in history, and the number of times people were truly transformed in their views based on who they were married to or slept with could be counted on one hand over the last few centuries.
I know this does not sit with well those who seek Ideological Purity, it didn’t set well with me when I first realized this many years ago. But it’s no different than those who hold to the notion that “the White man is the Devil,” and they find that there were some truly good White people in the world; people who hold to the notion that all Blacks who partner with non-Black are sell-outs or Toms don’t want to hear shit about Blacks who are married to non-Blacks making positive contributions to the Black Liberation Struggle. They will reject this even when you shot them evidence that Blacks married to non-Blacks retained their loyalty to the Struggle.
I gave up on purity a while ago, and I rest on evidence.
I’ve had a few Blacks married to non-Blacks who wanted to join the Struggle and felt rejected, that they couldn’t ever stand up and organize against White Domination because they were married to a White person, or a non-Black person. I would inform them that they had to find a multi-racial organization like the Revolutionary Communist, or the Earth Liberation Front, or Deep Green Resistance; or Black organizations that don’t exclude them like the Uhuru Movement, or simply start a Liberation organization that does not have a restriction on the participation of non-Blacks or those married to non-Blacks.
I don’t encourage them to fight to join organizations that shun those in multiracial relationships. I respect Black people’s right to dictate the standards for their membership and associations. Blacks have no obligations to be open or accepting of anyone, because too many have organized to attack and exploit us; so if a formation of Black Liberationist say you don’t qualify, the move on and find one that will allow you to contribute. The Struggle is big enough for all of us who have a sincere desire to join and advance it; and we need as many serious Africans as we can get.
I frustrates me to have to even get into who’s fucking who, or who’s married to who when we need to focus on Revolutionary Pan-African Liberation and Dismantling the Systems and Institutions of Capitalism and White Domination. But I need to get over my frustrations cuz matters of the heart and the bedroom have always leaked into the streets and into our organizations, so we do have to deal with and come to terms and understanding on these issues.
I don’t know if I’ve provided clarity or fed more confusions on this issue; but I did my best to offer you a complete answer.
Oh, I do agree with Dr. Bobby E. Wright, who encourage and embrace the participation of All Africans, from all walks of life to join in and make contribution to the Black Liberation Struggle and the destruction of Systems and Institutions of Oppression; Dr. Wright said that “no Black (man or woman) who’s not married to a Black person should hold a position of leadership over our organizations.”
Such leaders are more than just individuals, they are symbols, they embody ideas; and (due to our history) they should reflect our fullest representation of unity and our highest aspirations. Beyond that, I’m more invested the quality of your work than who you get down with.