The reason gods are male, vengeful, jealous, genocidal, sexist, authoritarian, nationalistic; and can claim to love humanity and at the same time threaten us with eternal damnation; is because the madmen who invented and propagated the gods were the same way.
When you see a culture’s God-concept, you see their collective mentality and what they aspire to. The culture that has colonized the world created gods that rape, slaughter, and engage in pedophilia and bestiality. Gods that eat their children. They later reformed those gods, but they still remained anti-sexual (anti-woman), vengeful, and omnicidal. From Zeus to Hey-Zeus; little has changed.
If you must have a god, reject those of your oppressors and return to your ancestral gods, or invent new, humane gods/goddesses that look just like you.